You’ve likely clicked on this blog post because you’ve been struggling which has led to things such as sadness, depression, exhaustion (mental, emotional, and physical), and maybe even hopelessness.
You desperately want to be loved by God, but you’ve been under the impression that you have to earn His love.
For example, you need to:

In other words, God has requirements that you need to consistently fulfill in order for Him to:

You’ve been trying your best to meet these so-called necessary requirements. But it’s not easy, right?

One, you're living under the constant weight and stress of these requirements.
Two, these are not easy requirements. You are a sinful, imperfect human being (just like everyone else on the planet) who is also dealing with various seasons of life–some more challenging than others.

This means that you often end up feeling like a failure or, at best, highly unworthy or inadequate.
As a result, you end up in this constant cycle of negative thoughts about yourself and God.

From a mindset perspective, the first step is to stop focusing on earning God’s love.
Nowhere in the Bible does God tell us that His love needs to be earned. (If you have been told that, it’s not biblically accurate.)
In fact, throughout the entire Bible, we see God consistently loving His people, and keeping His promises, despite their actions–whether that’s sinning, running away from God, turning their backs on Him, or making a mistake.
The most important thing to remember about God’s love is that His love for us stems from who He is–not what we do.
If sinning was an immediate disqualification for His love, then God would have abandoned Adam and Eve after they sinned in the Garden. And He definitely wouldn’t have sent Jesus, His one and only Son, to die on the cross for our sins so that we could be fully reconciled with God.

John 3:16-17 (NLT) says, “For this is how God loved the world: He gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life. God sent his Son into the world not to judge the world, but to save the world through him.”

God doesn’t want you to keep carrying this massively heavy burden of continuously trying to meet unrealistic expectations in order to somehow earn His love. He already loves you! So much so, that His desire is for you to lay down this worldly, man-made weight and tie yourself to Him.

In Matthew 11:28-30 (MSG), Jesus says, “Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.”
Note: When Jesus mentions “religion” here, He’s referring to the Bible’s definition of religion. In other words, He’s referring to the man-made rules that aren’t from God.

Friend, bask in this truth! You are completely free to stop trying to earn God’s love!

Again, God’s love for us stems from who He is–not what we do.
That doesn’t give us a permit to forgo being repentant. (In other words, we should always seek to turn away from sin and towards God and His forgiveness.)
But it does mean that we can walk through this life, facing both the ups and downs, knowing that God’s love is consistent and always present.

Psalm 36:7 says, “How priceless is your unfailing love, O God! People take refuge in the shadow of your wings.”
Psalm 109:26 says, “Help me, LORD my God; save me according to your unfailing love.”
Zepheniah 3:17 says, “The LORD your God is with you, the Mighty Warrior who saves. He will take great delight in you; in his love he will no longer rebuke you, but will rejoice over you with singing.”

Notice that in that last verse, as well as John 3:17 that we looked at earlier, that God is not interested in shaming or condemning you. That’s the world’s way–and Satan’s way–not God’s way.
So as you work on accepting that God loves you, don’t let your old “I need to pay something in order to be loved by God” mentality seep back into things here.
God’s love is always present and available.
God’s desire is to be in an intimate, safe, loving relationship with you. But He’s not going to force Himself on you. That’s not in His character.
Instead, He’ll patiently woo your heart while also working to remove the blockers that are keeping you from understanding His true character–and thus His love for you.

Those blockers are exactly why I felt led to create Relate Escape Place.
Because the way out of the dark place that you’ve been in isn’t a one-day pivot. It’s a process. And within that process, you need:

To finally learn the biblical truth about God’s character and His love for you
What His expectations truly are
How to start building the relationship with Him that you’ve been yearning for
Plus, you also need the support of women who understand exactly where you’ve been, where you currently are, and where you’re going

Mini Courses–To equip you with biblical truth and practical application when it comes to your relationship with God. The first three courses are: Decode God’s Love, Demystify God’s Character, and Journey with Jesus.
Tool Kits–These are a curated list of 3rd party items that can supplement your biblical knowledge, understanding of God and Jesus, and help you make continued progress. There are books, bible study tools, and even movies and TV shows.
Community–This is not a Facebook group. Relate Escape Place is hosted on a platform where the culture is ours to create! It’s safe. It’s focused. And there are some great AI features to help you easily connect with other women based on your profile. There are separate threads for each mini course, tool kit, and things such as prayer requests. Your words and questions are important–and they will always be easy to find by myself and other members.